Preparing for Your
Match Meeting
(Surrogate Edition).

Meeting for the first time is exciting and also a little scary! Preparing for your surrogacy match meeting will help you have the best introduction possible.  It’s completely normal to feel nervous.  Your intended parents feels nervous too!  This is actually a good sign, and if you are able to overcome  your nervousness and make a genuine connection, it’s a good indicator that your match will be successful.

Think of your match meeting as a coffee date. You will spend a little time getting to know each other, asking questions, and getting an overall feel for each other.

The match meeting is held virtually through zoom: 

• If you are new to zoom, download the application: PC or Mac, iOS, Android (we recommend using a computer instead of your phone, if possible!)
• Here is information on how to Join a Meeting
• For your match meeting, we will email you the specific link for the zoom match meeting.

Planning for the match meeting: 

• The Match meeting last about 30-60 minutes.
• They are hosted by a Case Manager, and usually both your case manager and the intended parent’s case manager are there. 
• Match meetings are attended by you, your spouse/partner (if you have one), and the intended parents, the surrogate.
  • It’s ok if your children pop in to say hello too, but this is an important conversation and little ones get bored easily.  Please plan to have a babysitter to help with keeping them busy so you can focus on meeting your intended parents for the very first time!

When everyone is present for the match meeting, the case managers will make introductions and then sit back quietly so you and your intended parents can get to know each other.  It’s a good idea to have a list of questions and topics you want to discuss at the Match Meeting. It’s also ok to talk about the things that are important to you in your match! You can ask about the number of embryos to transfer, the type of contact you all want to have, views on termination, prenatal care and birth preferences, upcoming travel and black out dates, and other topics. In most match meetings, these topics come up naturally, but if one of the important topics gets missed your Case Manager will make sure to ask about it!

After the meeting, you and your Case Manager will touch base to talk about how the meeting went!

• If you want to match: Yay! We will let you know as soon as we hear from the other party.
• If you don’t want to match: No worries! Tell your Case Manager and we will show you new profiles.

Tips for a Successful Match Meeting

Be open and honest.  It’s tempting to put your very best self forward and to be careful about what you say.  One of the keys to a successful and happy surrogacy relationship is making sure that you and your intended parents share the same expectations, so be sure to be open and honest about your surrogacy wishes and expectations.

Relax and Be Yourself: It’s okay to feel nervous, but remember, this meeting is about creating a connection. Your perfect intended parents will love you just exactly as you are.  

Trust Your Instincts: If something feels right (or doesn’t), trust your feelings.  If this wasn’t the right match for you, there are others!

The match meeting is a big step in the process of bringing your dreams of parenthood to life. Whether you find your perfect match in this meeting or continue searching, we’re here to support you every step of the way. If you have any questions about the process, don’t hesitate to reach out to your Case Manager.

You’ve got this!